The Pizza Diet

We had Sicilian pizza last night from Joey’s in Middletown. To this day, every time I have Sicilian pizza, it reminds me of the time a pediatrician put me on a pizza diet when I was 10-years-old.

I’m serious! I’ve always been overweight, since I was an infant, and I have been to many, many, MANY doctors in my lifetime. The first time I had high blood pressure I was only 18-months-old. My pediatrician at the time (not the pizza diet one) suspected I had Cushing’s Syndrome, a hormonal disorder where you overproduce cortisol. But back in the early 1980s, the testing wasn’t nearly as sophisticated as it is now. They wanted to inject dye into my brain or some craziness like that and my parents chose not to do that. Years later, I did a 24-hour urine collection to monitor my cortisol levels and they were normal. However, to this day I still have all of the symptoms of Cushing’s Syndrome/Disease. Doctors still suspect I have some kind of hormonal imbalance, which is obvious to me, too, but I haven’t been to an endocrinologist in a long time. Mostly out of frustration and procrastination, and fear.

So anyway, when I was 10-years-old, my parents took me to a pediatric specialist at Westchester Medical Center. He also suspected I had something wrong hormonally, but he wasn’t sure what without more in depth testing. So the first thing he wanted to see is if I COULD lose weight, so he put me on a 7-day pizza diet. But it wasn’t just pizza!! Nope. It was also MUFFINS! LOL

The Pizza Diet

• Breakfast: One muffin (any kind; I chose chocolate chip, of course) and 1 cup skim milk
• Lunch: One slice Sicilian-style cheese pizza
• Dinner: One slice Sicilian-style cheese pizza
• Snack: One slice Sicilian-style cheese pizza
• Beverages: Water or diet soda

He emphasized Sicilian-style. Good thing I live in NY and not the mid-west or the south where Sicilian-style pizza might have been harder to come by! haha I lived in Atlanta for 2 years, remember? Pizza was my #1 complaint–food-wise, lol.

Oddly enough, I actually did lose about 5 lbs on the pizza diet. Probably from crying, LOL. You’d think a diet of muffins and pizza sounds like a dream come true, and from a distance it does. But I remember–even at 10-years-old—that by the third or so day into it, I was BORED TO PIECES of Sicilian pizza and muffins. It became utterly repulsive. I wanted a hamburger or a hot dog or a freakin’ alfalfa sprout by that point. Anything other than pizza and muffins.

In the end, it boils down to calories in vs. calories out. The variables that affect the absorption of or use of calories and nutrients are: Your age, weight, gender, lean body mass percentage, activity level, stress level, environment, water weight, sleep, digestive health and bio bioavailability of foods consumed, types of foods, hormonal balance, and of course genetics. These factors are what make us individuals and what sets our personal metabolic rate. All of the online calculators give you estimates based on averages, or based on what normal should be for your stats. They never take genetics, body composition, stress, sleep, or hormones into consideration. And this is why trial and error is always the best way to gauge your true metabolic rate.

After eating 21 slices of Sicilian pizza in a week, it took me several years—like 15—to enjoy Sicilian pizza again, LOL. I enjoyed it last night along with a salad. I actually like salad more than Sicilian pizza. Thin crust… that’s another story.

What are some crazy diets you have been on? I have a laundry list a mile long with all of the ones I have tried. I’ll compile that for an upcoming post!

Caesar wants to go out for a walk and I have lots of organizing to do in the kitchen. Dustin has volunteered to help me today. Yay! It’s more fun to do chores when you have company.

Tagged as: diets, pizza, pizza diet, Sicilian pizza, vegetarian, weight loss